well. i'm back with my blogging. yeah. hmm.. dont' know wad should i say. been doing find with my single life. actually. been lonely also. everyone got their own friends. after school. no where to go. but just stay in school doing school service. i really don't know. i don't wanna hurt myself . i don't kwno wad to do. have i change? i think i have. haix. my feeling is like so lonely. which i dislike it. and with my this kind of attiude. haix. i really don't know la. haix. all i can do is pray hard le. haix. just trying to be how i am. i feel so trap. i can't even have my own decision. by forcing us doing something we don' t like. nothing good will happen in the end. example table tennis. starting already say. will let mi quit after competitions. now finish le. still don't let mi quit. still say wad. coz no cca. i got so much cca also no use lor! wad de hell! NORMAL TEC DON"T NEED CCA POINTS! waste our time on something which won't come in handy for my ite. wad's the use of it then?! coz i didn't go for the fuckking training. i have to serve school service. WHERE GOT SUCH THING DE?! i serve one week le. still have to serve more! ask HIM untill when. still say see my attendence in training. is like. he is taking my freedom away which is he don't have the right of it lor! i really don't know wad to do now le! i'm lost. lonely. no one will understand how i feel. haix.. been looking and reading over and over his blog. tears jurt continue drop. i miss him. feel so hopeless in myself. haix...